Friday, October 1, 2010

Man Up...Woman Lie

I had the pleasure of sharing a video exchange with one of my YouTube friends johntheother in which we discussed horrible dating rules men and women are expected to follow.

In johns video he explains that in all his online research he really found two sets of rules.

1. Rules for women that men wish women knew.

These rules tend to be self deprecating like,"Whenever possible say what you have to say during commercials" and "Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we." John states that the point of these rules is that "men are boorish idiots."

So that's where that comes from!

My question is...what came first the rules or the lack of depth? I have to admit it's been a while since I've dated and it's mostly because just about every guy I meet seems to care more about his car or biceps then about current events or politics.

Oh wait, didn't I hear a rule somewhere that you shouldn't discuss politics on the first date?

I can't share my body with a man whose mind I don't respect even if I don't plan on keeping him around. If you're one of the guys that actually thinks this way and you're reading this (which you probably won't be since this has nothing to do with cars or biceps) you're ruining my sex life with your blank stares. Good looks only get you so far honey so do a little reading!

2. Womens rules for men.

These rules usually come off very demanding like, "you better do this or your toast" or "YOU'RE WRONG."

I'm beginning to see a theme with both these sets of rules and it sounds like "men are not supposed to be too deep or think too much." *Sigh...I'm never getting laid :-(

Ultimately john states that he has one rule and it sounds good to me, "Treat women like adults."

I guess it best to let john speak for himself. Enjoy

As soon as I saw Johns video I was inspired and being that my content has been a little heavy lately I thought it would be something I could have a little fun with.

This video is my book review of
Think Like A Guy by Giuliana Rancic.

This book is filled with the stupidest dating advice I have ever heard in my entire life. It is full of just as much shallowness as the rules for men but with a healthy dose of slut shaming to wash it down. Some of the rules are:

Tip #38 Never wear a costume that requires a mustache. (Hey baby...ya wanna mustache ride?)

Tip #46 Don't own a dog that fits in your purse. (Sorry, Fifi.)

Most of this womans advice comes down to one rule...LIE!

Tip #13 Don't admit you were a bad student. (Did you know Albert Einstein didn't get very good grades?)

Tip #23 Never admit you've slept with more then five guys.
This one she just goes on and on about even into the next tip. Laughably she ends up saying you shouldn't be ashamed if you've been "around the block a few times" to which I say
She swears a man is going to dwell on it until his dying day. She even says he will think you're "nasty!"

ARG!!!!! Just watch the video:

Well, I'm sorry Mrs. Rancic (Formerly known as Ms. DePandi). As a sex positive feminist I refuse to lie about my sexual history to someone I may be intimate with. I don't kiss and tell but when I know I'm gonna kiss...I do tell.

Why? We sex positives are trying to change the puritanical and judgmental attitudes this society has concerning sex. I refuse to be ashamed of my sexuality and I refuse to pretend that I'm not but then lie as if I am.

I am a beautiful, responsible, sexual being and there's nothing wrong with that. I am not defined by what I do with my vagina and any man that judges me as such does not need the pleasure of my company.

Say what you like but sexual responsibility starts with honesty; with yourself and with your partner. We should not only be discussing our history's but what kind of contraception we will be using and our sexual boundaries as well. It is the safe, sane and responsible thing to do...

And do it I will!


  1. I like the blank stares, they tend to help my sex life.

  2. I agree 100%. How is it better to lie to someone about what you've done, what you're comfortable with and what you won't do under any circumstances.

    Lying to someone is no foundation for a good relationship. I've been with ten guys, some of them were my boyfriends, some of them were just casual and one of them was a one night stand. If a guy can't handle that information he doesn't deserve me. plain and simple.

    Thankfully I'm with someone who recognizes that its the past and only cares who I'm sleeping with now. He doesn't think I'm nasty lol.

  3. I'm really surprised that people think meeting others and finding sex partners needs "rules"; other than as a sign of insecurity ('I can't handle real people! Gimme some rules!') I couldn't care less about them.

    If I've learned a few things about relationships, mutual pleasure, sex, friendship, dating, and love, it certainly wasn't by collecting lists of overgeneralizations, but actually by trying to understand what motivates people around me, what kind of person I am (and how I'm different from others).

    As a man, I have absolutely no problems with partners who slept with other men before -- actually, I find it cool if a woman I date had lots of experience (it means she has interesting stories to tell, will probably have tried things I haven't and may have some advice to share, etc.). And I agree with the previous commenters -- I would feel at least hurt if the woman in question lied to try to appear more virginal. What for? Am I supposed to be a baby that needs protection from mommy's past experiences?

    This kind of lies from another person only suggests to me that she hasn't understood what kind of person I am. And somone who wants to be with me without knowing what kind of person I am is going to have trouble staying with me.

  4. There's a radio program out of London, Ontario that talks about freedom-related issues. This week's episode talked about the recent legal issues in Canada regarding prostitution.